The imperfect side of being a perfectionist

{Utiliza el traductor que aparece debajo para leer el texto en español}

A perfectionist person is defined by psychologists, as a person striving for flawlessness and setting high performance standards, accompanied by critical self-evaluations and concerns regarding others’ evaluations. I know, it sounds exhausting!

I used to believe that being a perfectionist was a really exceptional quality that looked outstanding on my CV. I mean, who wouldn’t want someone on their team that would deliver flawless jobs? Lately I’m pretty sure I’ve been proven wrong.

A person with a personality driven to perfectionism doesn’t apply this quality only to their job, it’s more of a way of living. This means that we are constantly looking for perfection on every single aspect of our lives, and it doesn’t stop. Ever. This is applied to our body, personality, relationships, how we do, or don’t do, every single activity in our life.

The outcome to this cocktail is constant in-satisfaction. We believe that everything could be improved, it can always be a little bit better. And that my friend leads to a great amount of stress because nothing, no one, not even ourselves, will ever be good enough.

I have come to this realization about my self not long ago, but I’m certain that this is not the way I want to live my life. It’s just so much unnecessary pressure on myself and everyone who surrounds me! Naturally breaking this type of cycles is extremely hard, since I don’t know another way of living, but at the same time I’m familiar with so many tools that can be used. Not using them is a choice.

There are three crucial aspects you need to learn if you feel identified with a perfectionist type of personality:

  1. Seek for help: Alright, this might sound a bit dramatic, but in order to know which is the limit between trying to get good results and perfect unachievable ones is to talk to someone else so they can tell you when to stop.
  2. Let go!: Once you are told, or simply realize, that you are going over board force yourself to stop. Or at least take a break. Taking some distance it’s always a good option.
  3. Relax: Perfection does not exist, is a sick game your mind plays on you. Meditate, learn breathing techniques, read, Netflix and chill or what ever sets you at ease. The world won’t fall apart because of tiny little details that honestly only you can see.

Spoiler alert: no one gives a F about most of the things, even though you strongly believe they care. No one will think better of you or love you more for being this way. Actually you might be causing the opposite reaction.